A Cup of Kindness Yet

The Times I Went to See Knightmare Live in 2025

By Theatre-Freak Twilso
Posted 04-01-2026

Happy 2026! No that’s not a salutation, that’s me pleading with an insentient universe for 2026 to be happy. You probably couldn’t hear my tone under the screaming of yet another geopolitical conflict.

Regardless, the new year’s supposed to be a time of reflection, change and making commitments you won’t keep. I’ve handled the change portion by drastically restructuring my website, and my unrealistic commitment is regularly writing blog entries, so I thought I’d finish it off by making my first entry a reflection on one of my favourite memories of 2025: My very first time seeing a Knightmare Live show! (and the second one I went to 9 months later).

Knightmare Live is an improv comedy show inspired by the 80s-90s cult classic gameshow Knightmare, which challenges members of the audience to venture blindfolded through an affectionate parody of the Dungeon of Deceit, facing monstrous riddles, tricky navigational challenges… and word puzzles. It’s currently in the 3rd year of it’s 10th anniversary tour (you do the maths) so I’ve been wanting to see it for a while, but this was the first instance of a show occurring near my location at the time. And it was well worth the wait. So worth the wait, that when they announced their special London show later that year, I made the trek to go see it too.

Not wanting to forget a second, I took detailed notes of the events of both shows afterwards. And now I’ve preserved those wonderful memories here.

15th of February – Newbury Corn Exchange

It was the quest for the Cup, something I initially considered a bad omen, as it was the only quest object never retrieved on the show. The first dungeoneer was a woman named Cat who had her sister and another woman as advisors. This advisor team would stay on for the rest of the show.

The first puzzle was rearranging letters, worn by members of the audience, into a special word. These audience members included two particularly sweet little kids who become relevant later. They met a man at the tavern who – after getting her to show him her non-talent of humming and whistling at the same time – offered them a choice of three crowd sourced clue objects: A tape measure, a glowing ghost keyring and a wheelchair repair kit. They went for the tape measure (incorrect, but largely inconsequential). The man then revealed himself to be Sir Glen of the Glen, a noble knight and Treguard’s best friend, and promised to get her safety to Level 2. He was then promptly beaten to death by a goblin in the next room, and Cat escaped by the skin of her teeth with some quick moving.

Next was the clue room, where Cat nearly starved to death – and nearly fell of the stage – as the whole audience shouted at her to put the banana in her knapsack. She then held up a Spyglass to see Lord Fear revealing that only a true monarch could get past the guard he’d placed at the door to Level 3. And also that his evil plan was to spread pollution. Luckily, she put the Spyglass down near immediately at the shouts of the audience when Lord Fear noticed her presence, preventing him from creeping up on her.

Her attempts at leaving the room were thwarted by the appearance of the Wall Monster Olgarth who asked for the wheelchair repair kit. He was quickly placated with some affectionate scratches (although she did end up scratching first the puppeteer, then Olgarth’s eye) and he asked her two well-known riddles. She answered correctly and was rewarded with the spell SLOW. Then to herald temporal disruption (the interval) his eyes fell off.

They went straight into the action after the interval with a bomb room, one that unfortunately killed Cat. She went to join the advisors, and a new dungeoneer was required. After chatting to the audience about who had watched Knightmare as a kid, Treguard asked if anyone had applied. It was revealed that a woman, Tracy, had applied but never received a response and the father of those two cute kids (still relevant) had been accepted as a contestant for series 9 – a series never made as Knightmare was cancelled after 8 series. Therefore as a chance for redemption, the Helmet of Justice was offered to Tracy.

Tracy had a rocky start leaving the starting room, only to promptly starve to death in the next one after failing to make it to a guard holding a banana in time. At Lord Fear’s mercy she was given a second chance. After successfully retrieving the banana, she picked up a Christmas cracker from a table and the advisors quickly realised the crown inside would make her the monarch needed to pass. After dropping, and then ripping the crown, she was eventually allowed access into Level 3.

In the first room of Level 3, she encountered two goblins who asked her if she was one of them. After being instructed by her advisors to lie, she was then asked to prove it by doing the goblin dance that only and all goblins know (Two stomps left foot, two stomps right foot, step forward, clap, step back, clap, strike a pose) as demonstrated by one of them. After giving a rather botched rendition devoid of claps at the guidance of the advisors, she was allowed to pass anyway into the final chamber – the moving maze!

Once again constructed by members of the audience, including those two cute kids (still relevant) and Lord Fear himself, Tracy made an admirable attempt but was killed when a goblin snuck up behind her. One more dungeoneer was required. Then, the younger of the two cute kids, the son of the potential contestant, a little boy named Isaac who had been staring Lord Fear down the whole show, defected from the maze and became the final dungeoneer. With the aid of the SLOW spell to protect him from the goblin, he made it to the (coffee) cup and was victorious. He was then offered an ultimatum by Lord Fear – place the cup in the Helmet and save the sea turtles, or throw it into the audience and join him in ruling the dungeon in pollution and evil. After admitting it was a tough, he decided to put it in the helmet, completing the circle and succeeding where his father could not. A fitting end to a show that somewhat inadvertently became about second chances and redemption.

As for me? I wasn’t quite confident enough to volunteer to go on stage, although I did participate from the audience, shouting advice, riddle answers, and Knightmare statistics during an audience response section. I managed to keep my mouth shut when Treguard mentioned his mum though, as the kids didn’t need to hear about the deep cut of the Dunshelm family’s massacre.

15th of November – Leicester Square Theatre

I only just managed to get tickets at the back. The place was filled with Knightmare fans, and I ran into Martin Harder, one of the hosts of Temporal Discussion (go listen), who was kind enough to compliment my jacket.

The first thing that became apparent is that the dungeoneers had been pre-selected – by being nominated by their loved ones. That lead to some less than optimal gameplay. The first dungeoneer, whose name escapes me, was one of the unlucky few who auditioned for the show but didn’t make it on. He blamed his advisor candidates, obviously. But as this was his first time seeing the live show and he wanted the full experience, he was consensually killed off in the first room, clobbered on the head for being too slow when completing the word puzzle.

The next dungeoneer was Collin the Reluctant (a warrior’s name) whose talent of leaving early would be valuable in the real dungeon, but proved slightly hindering in the live show. He arrived in the tavern, where a mysterious cloaked figure had joined the typical clue-bearing barkeep. After his advisors (part of the cast rather than the audience) sent him back-and-forth between them with indecision (and Lord Fear too, who was responsible for passing the singular microphone between them), they eventually settled on the cloaked figure. She requested he proved his adventurers’ spirit through song or dance, and while he initially responded he would rather die, he was eventually goaded into some knee-bend bobbing. This appeased the figure, who shed her cloak to reveal herself as Gloria of Devonport, first sword of Dunshelm. She then lead him towards the barkeep for his clue objects. Between a Time Piece of Nostalgia, a Fake Potato, a Skull and a Plastic Flamingo, he obviously selected the Flamingo.

Collin’s exit skills came to a peak in the next room, where when faced with Gloria telling him to run from a goblin, did so before the goblin could even clobber her to death (she’d left her sword in the Tavern), and so she had to go and fetch him back so they could do the death scene.

The next room featured the life force clock, which ticked down as Collin continued pretending to eat the banana while the whole room yelled at him to instead put it in his knapsack. Then we segued into a very special spyglass sequence where, after a short bit about Lord Fear initially misplacing his scrying dish, it was revealed that the Lord Fear of Knightmare Live is actually an apprentice under the true Lord Fear of Knightmare canon and that he’d come to make a 10 year check up – which meant a guest appearance by Mark Knight himself. Plus a guy in a Frightknight costume that was remarkably accurate to the model. After Knight!Lord Fear mocked Live!Lord Fear for not being cruel enough, Live!Lord Fear both revealed his evil plan of pollution again and a new monster, a Chittering Skull puppet affectionately referred to as Grandmama. Knight!Lord Fear suggested a guardian for Level 3, one who would only let a true Monarch through.

Next was the Wall Monster, who demanded the Time Piece, but was placated with devouring the Flamingo. The two standard riddles were asked, and while the audience supplied the first answer before the first riddle even finished, Collin foolishly answered incorrectly for the second, resulting in him being consumed by Grandmama.

After the interval, the next nominated dungeoneer was Nathan, who would be turning 18 at midnight that night and entered the stage wearing a sparkly pink sash. Unfortunately he met a near-immediate end in the bomb room, as Collin’s failure to answer the riddle meant he didn’t have the magic spell required to slow the bomb fuse enough to escape. He did succeed in retrieving the cracker containing the crown for the next dungeoneer, Emily, a young teen girl in a Hellfire Club shirt who had previously been part of the starting word puzzle. Emily quickly used it to bypass the Level 3 guardian, although it was draped awkwardly over a horn rather than worn properly.

Emily was also asked to prove herself a goblin by doing the goblin dance (jaunty walk forward, jaunty walk left and right, step forward, step back, step forward, spin around, star jump), and as a result was given a prisoner to escort – who turned out to be Pickle the Elf, miraculously alive after Treguard’s failed attempt to ‘get rid of him’ long ago. Very much playing to the people who found Treguard’s assistants annoying all those years ago.

Then it was revealed that the two Lord Fears had joined forces to send Grandmama to attack the advisors, which could only be beaten by two Treguards – which meant an appearance by Hugo Myatt himself! After pulling Knightmare’s classic pretend-to-be-a-beggar gimmick, he sent Lord Fear back to his domain with a BANISH spell, and Emily back into the dungeon with a reprise of his spiel from the show.

Now fully aware they had two advisors, two Lord Fears, two Treguards, a dungeoneer and Pickle on the relatively small stage, they decided to bring on 5 more people to make the moving labyrinth for the final room. Nathan returned to wield an umbrella painted with a bloody revolving saw blade. Emily was haphazardly guided through the maze by advisors who could barely see her – once nearly stumbling into Nathan’s saw, once almost stepping back into the awaiting maw of the Chattering Skull – but claimed the (coffee) Cup as her Quest object. With two young kids who formed part of the maze as her council, she chose to turn down Lord Fear’s offer of world domination, placing the cup into the Helmet of Justice and winning the game.

After a send off from Hugo Myatt with the ‘It’s only a game… Isn’t it?’ the show came to a close. It was so incredibly wonderful, and it was definitely worth the wrangling of the London public transport system I had to do afterwards.

Conclusion

Knightmare Live is part of a long tradition of amazing fanworks produced by the Knightmare community, and an experience I’d definitely recommend to anyone who holds any fragment of affection for the show. Or anyone at all, as my very indulgent mother who has never seen an episode (but was keen for any bonding time with her adult daughter) accompanied me to both shows and reportedly had a great time.

It was definitely a glimmer of light for me in a dark and uncertain year, and I strive to find similar bright spots in the year to come. Happy 2026!